Thursday, June 6, 2013

It's Ok to not ALWAYS have your "crap" together

A friend reminded me today that it's ok to not always have my "crap together". This is something I needed to hear.

I am a person who can't stand a messy, disorganized house. Yet I live in one everyday. I hate seeing piles of unfolded laundry, but I am surrounded by them. Dirty dishes all over my counter drive me nuts, yet there they are. This is the life of a Mom with 3 kids.

After chauffeuring my kids all day, cooking for them, bathing them, packing next day's lunch and everything else involved, the last thing I have time to do, or want to do, is fold 5 people's laundry. My eyes are almost closed, but the house could really use a quick Swiffer and if I was really on top of things, I'd change the sheets that are truthfully a good week overdue.

But wait a minute! My kids are happy and healthy. On top of that, I've managed to maintain a small amount of sanity through all of the chaos. I think I'm doing ok.

We, as Moms especially, are WAY too hard on ourselves. We want to be the best Mom, the best wife and seem "together" all of the time, but you know what? To your children, you are the best Mom and they wouldn't replace you for anything. Your husband is in awe of how you keep it all together after a long day of crazy children and a puppy running circles around you as you make dinner. They love you just exactly how you are and wouldn't change a hair on your head.

So what if you didn't do dishes today. Who cares if you take your next outfit out of the laundry bin instead of off a hanger. I promise you that even the most put together Mom on the playground has the same struggles as you do, she just hides it better. For all you know, her designer jacket was stuffed under her bed until she put it on today and her hair is in an up-do because she didn't shower this morning. Don't be deceived by these Moms, because they are just like you.

Next time you have to choose between dishes and a moment to relax, RELAX! You will be a better Mom to your kids because you took time for you! Don't forget that before you had kids, you had needs and still do. Don't be afraid to take time for you!


  1. Love this!!! I agree 1000% Can I agree that much? We all are in the same boat and have our dirty little secrets. Literally, we are dirty. LOL

    My house gets cleaned when people come over. My furniture is all used. My clothes are worn REPEATEDLY. I have no problem admitting that. And my kids are teenagers!

    Always choose people over things. Always. And always support other moms. I'm so on board with that. Thank you for writing this! :)

  2. Thank you for your comment. We're not alone! :)

  3. I learned the hard way -almost driving myself into the ground(where I was no good to anybody) trying to have it "all". And one day I realized that it's just an impossible goal. I have learned and accepted on any given day I am: a good Mom, good at my job, a good friend or a good wife. I can't excel at all of them everyday- but I can sleep well if i've done at least one of them (sometimes even two) well! :)

  4. Published as "Letter of the Day" in the Moncton Times & Transcript, June 24, 2013

  5. This is so true. I'm always hitting myself over the head for not being able to do everything perfectly. Like you said, I want to be the best mom, the best wife, the best version of me, all the time, every day. But it really isn't that easy and most of the time I'm just a okay version of the person I want to be.

    Miwa @
    But it's so important to have a few minutes to yourself--to be able to sit back, take a deep breath and really take in how great a job you're doing.

    Thanks for the reminder ;)

  6. Thank you for reading and sharing. It's good for us Moms to stick together and make sure we remind eachother that we're all in the same boat. :)

  7. A long time ago I decided there was a difference between clutter and dirt. Clutter I could live with in it's little bits strewn about the house, but dirt? If my home was clean beneath the clutter, things didn't look so bad.